i know i haven't been blogging for ages, and many pple have already updated their blogs super many times ... sorry! can't of tied up with work ...

now i have one problem - i just realized that i have had a crush on a guy, and i thought this might work out (after so long from my last relationship)... cuz i have never meet a person whose thinkings, attitudes, personalities are like "copy & paste" of mine... i was so amazed & shocked, as i chatted with him more... i noticed many signs...

1) he always initiates chats with me everynite on msn

2) many of his sendiments are relective of how i think / feel

3) both of us are chatty pple, so can chat very well, never ending topics

4) he's quite funny, makes me laugh always

and that's why i always look forward for him to come online & chat... everytime we chat, i also kinda excited & happy...

so ultimately, i conclude that we can clique very well & somehow i feel abit of chemistry there btwn us!

but today is our 2nd meet-up (he asked me for dinner), but unfortunately, i have to attend a talk at 7pm, and he was late, so we were abit rushed for dinner.

initially i tot that it's a sign that he's asking me out for dinner, ever since from our 1st meet-up, i have been suspecting that he might likes me ?! but... after today's outing, and i think after knowing him abit more, i guess my tot was wrong. it's just that HE IS LIKE THAT > this is just his personalities... despite he's a good guy, share alot of the similar thoughts as me, but i think it's just my one-sided crush... i doubt he feels the same as me.

one thing that kept me pondering for very long is that, very often 60% of his conversation with me (face 2 face) also involved his EX-gf; i wonder WHY ?!?! it's kinda insensitive right? i wonder that does that mean? it seems like he still can't live without his ex-gf, though he claimed that his Ex & him are still good friends, and she's still very dependent on him. maybe that's why he keeps mentioning him... i bet she has changed his life alot over their 3 years relationship.

i suddenly think that i should distinguish this sparks / baby-fire, b4 it burns my finger. i can feel that it's kinda burning the tip of my finger, sianz.. but this kind of things, u can't just say blow off then will blow off mah! anyway, he doesn't know such incident officially, so... better just remain & beahve the same as myself. not to hold any hope already! ~ i know! that's quite sad right? but what to do? :(

Labels: crush / crash